I have been a weird version of homesick lately. I miss my sister and niece like a limb but it's different then a miss-you-homesick feeling.
I was miserable in Florida. I loved having family and friends to be with but I always wanted to live elsewhere. Now I do. Does this make me happier? yes. Does it solve the what to do with my life dalema?
No. Not that it even is one, it's just natural for me to question and reflect where I am in life. I just knew, If I was going to invest in myself and buy an education for myself, putting myself through college (shout out to hillbilly loan officer Sally Mae who I am slowly paying off, I think I'll be 50 when I'm finished) I would work. I like to work. I like my job very much. I like to challenge myself and be good at what i do. But I wonder.
I never wanted to be someone's wife or mom. Not that it's a bad thing, at all. But i see my friends, I see them having babies and getting married and though I don't want it, I do wonder if it makes them happier.
everyone puts their best happy face when it comes to broadcasting it to the world, like Facebook. So it really is hard to tell whose happy and whose faking One song I've been listening to is this Norwegian band, Kings of Convenience. They have such an amazing song called "Homesick" I listen to it all the time. Its an amazing band in general but I just love that song. I am posting lyrics and youtube clip because this is now become a lamer Livejournal then Livejournal was.
"Homesick"
I'll lose some sales and my boss won't be happy,
but I can't stop listening to the sound
of two soft voices
blended in perfection
from the reels of this record that I've found.
Every day there's a boy in the mirror asking me...
What are you doing here?
Finding all my previous motives
growing increasingly unclear.
I've traveled far and I've burned all the bridges
I believed as soon as I hit land
all the other options held before me,
would wither in the light of my plan.
So I'll lose some sales and my boss won't be happy,
but there's only one thing on my mind
searching boxes underneath the counter,
on a chance that on a tape I'd find...
a song for someone who needs somewhere to long for.
Homesick.
Because I no longer know where home is.
but I can't stop listening to the sound
of two soft voices
blended in perfection
from the reels of this record that I've found.
Every day there's a boy in the mirror asking me...
What are you doing here?
Finding all my previous motives
growing increasingly unclear.
I've traveled far and I've burned all the bridges
I believed as soon as I hit land
all the other options held before me,
would wither in the light of my plan.
So I'll lose some sales and my boss won't be happy,
but there's only one thing on my mind
searching boxes underneath the counter,
on a chance that on a tape I'd find...
a song for someone who needs somewhere to long for.
Homesick.
Because I no longer know where home is.
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